The Importance of Friendship in Marriage

I am beyond grateful for the wonderful example of my parents' marriage. In all the years that I lived at home, I never once saw them fight. This isn't to say that they didn't have disagreements or arguments, but they did a great job of diffusing those arguments in front of us children. The way that a couple is able to handle conflict is a great indicator of the quality and overall satisfaction of the relationship. It is said that for every negative thing that you may do in a relationship (for example, criticizing your spouse), it takes five positive things to get that relationship back to equilibrium. I was surprised by this ratio, but it gives you a good idea of the way that negative sentiments can affect the quality of a relationship.

"Friendship is vital in marriage"

In our marriage class this week, we learned that strong marriages are founded on strong friendships. You may have heard the phrase, "You marry your best friend." Well, that would be ideal! But in many cases, it isn't true. It makes sense though, that if your relationship is first a strong friendship, then your marriage will thrive. That foundation of a friendship will always be there and will not be moved by the challenges of life. When you think of your best friend, you probably think of someone whom you go to whenever something difficult comes your way. You think of someone that you can talk to anything about, one with whom you can be completely yourself. You probably think of someone whom you can laugh and cry with. Friends may disagree at times, but they know that they can't stay mad at each other for long, because they miss their best friend! This is why friendship is so vital in marriage. Life is tough, and it throws you some unexpected curve-balls. But the blows are softened when you can take them with your best friend by your side.

I am grateful for the best friend in my life. I am not yet married, but I am recently engaged. Before we started dating, Justin and I referred to each other as "my best friend." Although we lived two thousand miles apart, he was the first person I wanted to talk to when something went wrong. I always knew that he would be there for me and that he would give me good advice. I knew that he would want the best for me and so I trusted him. Somehow, time passed and what was once a friendship, caught on fire and became an abiding love. He is still my best friend and he always will be. This is why I feel confident that we will have a successful and happy marriage. I look forward to the difficult and the joyful times that will arise, because I know that we will grow together and that our friendship will only grow stronger.

Me and my best friend!